This is the front of the book....

And here's a bit of the inside. I called this journal "Count Down to Transplant". It's still a work in progress!

Just $30 and I'll be at $300....please sponsor me! Every dollar helps!!


This is the Prayer Chain I made while Gus was in the hospital before he died. I keep it on our mantle as a reminder to me of God's answered prayers...He answered them all. Sometimes, He didn't answer in the way I wanted Him to but He did answer. If I had started this chain when we checked in the hospital the last time, I would have a much bigger heap of chain. I only thought about this toward the end of Gus' life. I had it taped to the wall and the nurses knew that when I came into Gus' room that I would want to know which links I could add to the chain. They were great and so understanding....I miss those gals!
"One hundred years from now, it will not matter what my bank account was, how big my house was, or what kind of car I drove. But the world may be a little better, because I was important in the life of a child." --Forest Witcraft






Contents:
| Waiting list candidates | 96,885 | as of today 5:54pm |
|---|---|---|
| Transplants January - April 2007 | 9,217 | as of 07/20/2007 |
| Donors January - April 2007 | 4,663 | as of 07/20/2007 |
- Heart
- Lungs (2)
- Liver
- Kidneys (2)
- Pancreas
- Small Intestine

I've been working on crocheting squares for This Eclectic Life's Share a Square Project. These squares will be put together to make afghans for kids with cancer. I'll have to admit, I've made quite a few but I haven't dropped them in the mail yet. My goal is to send these on the way first thing Monday....I'm really, really going to try to do that! lol!!






August 21, 2006
These dreams of Gus are wearing me out! I wake up and sometimes I have to jog my memory a bit to realize that he really is not here anymore. Last night I dreamt that I had signed up for a literature class which was right next door to the NICU where Gus was. I had decided to not check in on him for some reason but instead asked one of the mom’s I ran into in the hallway to tell me how Gus was doing. (I would NEVER have done that! LOL!) She told me that he was doing ok..that he had would desat into the 20s (this is a very big deal..not good at all!) on a regular basis but then he would recover and when she left he seemed to be fine. So I went in and the doctors told me that they didn’t know what to do with him so I could just take him home and feed him and see what happened. So that’s what I did…however, I was only able to feed him sterile ice cubes so he didn’t grow very much!! He did babble and had a hard time keeping his diaper on though!! Then the phone rang….and I was yanked out of dreamland….
Dreams during grief are very common.



1. Freeze. Place toy inside a freezer bag, then place in freezer for 24 hours.
2. Wash/Dry. Machine wash warm, delicate cycle/tumble dry high.
Do not use bleach or fabric softener. Recommend use of fabric bag for
wash/dry cycle and allow toy to cool before giving toy to child.
3. Cuddle with confidence.
4. Repeat this process every certain number of weeks, as specifically directed for each toy.

I was just thrilled when I heard that BlogCatalog wanted us all to blog about Organ Donation today! My son, Gus, was waiting for a liver/small bowel but died this past May. His little body could hold out no longer.
I know that when we discuss organ donation, we are discussing the donation of adult organs. No one wants to even consider the fact that children die and can be organ donors too. I know I never wanted to think about so I didn't. I felt that if I even thought in the direction, that I was saying I would be ok if my child died. I know that sounds strange but I just didn't want to jinx things.
I know now that organ donation is something that should be discussed before you are in a stressful situation and unable to make a decision. Talking about donating organs is not going to kill you or your child. There are so many children out there who are waiting for these organs. Gus was at the top of the national list for three months....I just have a hard time believing that there were not children who died who would have been a match for him.
I'm not bitter and I'm not angry. The outcome of our story is fully in God's hands. It is just my wish that families would be more willing to donate organs of their precious children who have died....from great tragedy, such a wonderful gift can be given.
I will be participating in this year's Blogathon over at Gus' Gang. The charity I will be blogging for is COTA: Children's Organ Transplant Association. I would love for you to come visit me on the 28th and I would love to be able to raise a ton of money for this organization!
For more information:
OrganDonor.gov
Unos


As I try to climb my way out of the pit, I realize who’s words I have been focusing on…who has been shooting me with little fiery darts of doubt and condemnation. I remember the verse in 1 John 4:4, “Greater is He who is in me…” and I know that even though satan is attacking me, I will never be overcome by him. My source of strength is the Lord who is much more powerful.
Peace starts to envelope me and I hear the Lord yet again “It’s just a matter of time, Jenny. “ I know exactly what He is saying…I look over to my right and there, a little bit from me, is Gus on a red ride-on toy…he smiles and blows me a kiss. I turn to Jesus to say “thank you” and He smiles and says “Soon…”



Because he was born so early he has developed a level 3 and level 4 Brain Bleeds, Hydrocephalus which required the placement of a reservoir, an unclosed heart valve (PDA), and stage 3 ROP eye disease with Rush disease.

Please join me in praying for this sweet little one...Arianna. Her pediatrician has found that her thyroid is not working quite right and is going to be consulting a specialist to determine what treatment options there are for Arianna. Of course, Arianna's parents are worried about all of this. We need to pray for Arianna's complete healing and also for her parent's to be filled with peace and discernment about which treatment to chose.



Grayson is now reading! He's like a genius or something! lol!! I've heard that he likes the ladies and has never met a stranger. Currently, Grayson is dealing with some fluid that is hanging out in his ears. He'll be going to an ENT soon so let's pray that this pesky little problem can be cleared up!